Today's Joke: Get Your Eyes Tested, Buddy

A man bumps into an old high school friend he hadn't seen for a number of years. His old friend was notorious for bragging back in high school - about his possessions, achievements and relationships, so he wondered if much had changed in the time since he last saw him. 
It wasn't long before the man realized his old friend hadn't changed much at all - on and on he rambled, talking about his amazing job, his huge mansion and the new Porsche he'd just bought himself. 

At one point, the old friend pulls out a photograph of his wife and shows it to the man. "She's beautiful, isn't she?" the old friend asks.  "If you think she's gorgeous, you should see my girlfriend," replies the man. 
"Why? Is she a stunner too?"
"No, she's an optometrist."